To a bisexual man this seems a very lame form of domination.
People have odd gender issues don’t they?
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A lot of what passes for male heterosexual submissiveness is really just sublimated or masquerading homosexuality. And in that case, many of its characteristics are lame. Not because it is homosexual, but because it isn’t honest, and because it creates a false impression of heterosexual male submissiveness.
But, in the case of a genuinely exclusively heterosexual male, for a woman to perform symbolic irrumatio with her fingers or toes or a dildo or especially with a strap-on — if because that’s what she wants to do and not simply in response to some fantasy of his — is very dominating. The “physical” sensation for her is limited, so the gratification must be in the symbolism.
The point has often been made that symbols are what one makes of them and so sex acts are what one makes of them, and the parties to penetration of the mouth need not see the oral partner as at all submissive. However, symbols are informed by cultural context. Fellatio, and even more so irrumatio, have thousands of years of imputed meaning. And, in the case of irrumatio, control is very much taken by the penetrating partner.